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A Bit About Things On The Stairs

Why do people leave things on the stairs? I never understood this. The last place I would put anything to be taken upstairs/downstairs is on the stairs. The reason is that aren’t stairs generally believed to be actually dangerous? I mean we hear about people falling down the stairs all the time and hurting themselves and probably a portion of the time it involves in addition an obstacle or object in ON THE STAIRS.

The thing is placed on the stairs for the intention of it to be taken down or up the stairs usually by someone who is not responsible for the thing on the stairs. They in fact put it there as a concrete reminder that it needs to be taken off the stairs and to it’s place. A concrete reminder to someone who for whatever reason is fine with something being where it is.

You will find the odd object, a box of tools, maybe well-folded underwear on the stairs. They did a whole episode on Everybody Loves Raymond about a suitcase on the stairs. This time it was put on the stairs landing. Or as I call it a hub or a connecting flight location for things on the stairs.

From my point of view though, if you are willing to put something in the stairs, why not simply take it to its final destination? I think if something irritates you so much that you are willing to put it on the stairs for delivery, shouldn’t you also just suck it up, get humble, and make that journey up or down the stairs. I mean think about how you would feel if someone trying to innocently negotiate those stairs, step on the object and careen and fall downstairs and break/fracture/sprain/injure something in the process?

Don’t look at it as someone being inconsiderate of you by not putting their stuff back in it’s place. There are people out there who just don’t roll that way. You can’t train someone to be anal who let’s things go like that. It’s kind of like trying to teach a snake how to do the foxtrot. It’s like trying to make a wolf lie down with the lambs. Not going to happen. In fact such a person will look at that something on the stairs and even might think that such a thing IS in its location. Why it is only natural that it be on the stairs since it travels to wherever it is needed. Good thinking.

Another way to look at it if you need an optimistic reason to take something you are not responsible for on the stairs: you’ll get some exercise. You are willing to drive 15 minutes to a gym, take a walk 2 miles long, and yet your not willing to move something up or down a hundred feet because its on the stairs?

For myself, I have never intentionally placed something in the stairs for someone else to take up. If it irritates me enough that something is not in its correct location, then I am the one to move it myself. But what happens if you don’t know the correct location?

Another thing is that the whole putting things in the stairs concept is great in theory, but it doesn’t work. I have seen things stay in stairs for months, sometimes even years. And when they are put there, they usually quickly get company. Soon the stairs become a repository for misplaced items. It is like a congregation. Doesn’t belong here…but at the same time it really isn’t worth the effort to take it to its conclusion either.

So it just stays there, kind of sad, watching the melancholy spectacle of those who step around it to get to their final destination. Sometimes it is looking at the stuff in the person’s arms with envy. “If only I was that stuff, if only I was important enough to be promoted to a non stop voyage to where it is I need to be.”

Instead like an artery blockage it remains there in the digestive system of the house. And someday there will be a hemorrhage or it will be like passing a kidney stone. Or even worse, someone trips over it while going down the stairs.

Still, it takes all kinds.

The Promise of Social Media or the Fragmentation of Communication?

Some people think that with the advent of new media/social media/user generated content that there is going to be a time when there are no standards, and as such, there will be a chaos. With no barriers or hoops to jump through, there will be blogs without sentences or paragraphs. There will be unedited podcasts that will go into, gasp, non sequiturs. There will be video without cuts and editing, where parts of it might even seem incoherent. There will be songs that are over 3 minutes long. There will be those bucking the format of every traditional form of media KNOWN TO MAN.

Furthermore, “objective standards” previously adhered to will now be dismissed. That is, if you define objective standards as those standards made for a large group by a very small select group of people. Call them the mediators of content, or what you will, but now the threat is that all bets are off. Or better yet, under evaluation.

Those who enjoy the promise of user generated content see this as an opportunity to create content and make a living where a barrier of entry had been previously present. Whereas the rule was once that a small quantity of content was made to appeal to a large audience, now a large quantity of diverse content can be sent to small, more specialized audiences.

What cable television did to the broadcast industry decades ago is now happening all at once to all different forms of media because of the internet. Only now, they can create their own “channels.” As such, they can take risks that traditional media was never willing to make. There are podcasts out there devoted to the “Big Lebowski.” Someone can start a blog concerning auto racing in the 1970’s. Another person could create a film documentary concerning larpers. The sky is the limit.

People can decide for themselves what they like, what they find of value, and can also add to the conversation ideas of what could make the content better, or if it has any value at all.

What about standards? As time goes on, there are bound to be changes in standards and qualifications. For instance, office work once required typing, now it also requires computer skills. Any advancement in technology changes the qualifications of certain occupations.

In communications and in media, there is one standard that I believe will be adhered to and that is - whatever it takes to communicate more effectively in a given situation, that will remain. Thus, spelling and grammar will remain a standard because without it, people will not understand one another. However, in any given situation there might be some modification. For instance, in emails or blogs, people sometimes do not end a sentence with a period but an emoticon usually as a way to tell the audience if they are being serious, joking, or tongue in cheek. Is this a breakdown of objective standards or qualifications for a particular bit of writing or does it lend itself to a less formal effective bit of communication?

On the traditional side of that though is there might be fragmentation as people venture out into their own specialization. Used to be you could talk to someone about what you watched on television or heard on the radio, or what book you read. There was a sense of shared culture. But now, with all the new opportunities and choices that await us, there is a chance we will become more niche and less homogenized in our culture.

As the long tail gets longer, it will become harder to relate to one another perhaps, or it could be that there will be all that much more to share when we get together.

Composition Snob

Maybe I am a bit of a snob, and that is why I begin a blog post in Pages™ as opposed to Marsedit™ or simply typing into the blog software. I don’t like the way the font looks on Marsedit when I create the draft. It is courier and it reminds me of a dot matrix printer. Ironically the window where it previews the text, the text looks just fine, it is only while composing it that it looks rudimentary. So, that is why I usually start composing in a word processing program before moving it to Marsedit where I use it to add links where needed, and do other html related work to it.

Dogs in Theory and In Truth

Someone in Twitter™ was talking about what dog breeds they despise sent me on a trip through time and space on my history with dogs and my thoughts regarding the canine species. I love dogs, love the idea of having a dog, but I don’t like the reality of having one. This I can say as someone who as a kid had a dog, that grew up, and in turn took my dad on walks. I can also say this as a kid who eventually lost his black Labrador to a nice farm where it must have enjoyed the open spaces and lakes much more than a backyard span with the area of an oversized dog pen.

When I imagine having a dog, I imagine all the good times I would have. Look that guy with the dog in the passenger seat in the car. You are a loner, but suddenly your Han Solo with a wookie. You are the type of loner who might be doing the Kessel run in less than 4 parsecs and maybe have princess Leia waiting for you at home.

Or I think about taking my dog on walks in the park. Maybe meeting a woman who also has a dog, something small and unobtrusive on her part, and then she takes a look and she knows this guy is responsible because he has to keep up with his dog and that makes some sort of subliminal impression.

Think also of the dog that saves you when a fire starts, or the Siberian husky that walks into your room at 3am in the morning when you are sure the ft tall dolls sitting near the open window are beginning to talk among the sounds of cars running over wet pavement and licks you on the palm of your hand in trying to comfort your fears.

Then there is the dog reality. The dog that barks because it needs constant attention. The dog that drinks from the toilet then licks your face. The dog that makes the whole house smell and have the ambience de la pooch. The dog that poops wherever and whenever it will. It needs walking, talking, bathing, feeding, and of course you have to keep an eye on it to make sure it doesn’t chew up and spit out the interior of your house.

“But you could get a small dog”

I think the small dog is like the gateway drug of those people trying to palm off their dog addiction onto you. I don’t want to be walking a rodent on an extend o leash at 9pm at night and taking up the whole street while Minnie has to smell the base of every mailbox in a two mile walk

These dogs also notoriously have some sort of bark tourrett’s syndrome going on that can annoy anyone within a 2.5 mile radius. I think some couples buy them as some sort of anti social early warning detection system.

I like Benji and the dog from “As Good As It Gets” and found them to be a heartwarming addition to the movies of my past, but I don’t want the Taco Bell dog or any other genetically manipulated rat dog for a pet. I have a hard enough time taking care of myself. Don’t even get me started on those misguided individuals who dress their dogs in clothing and take them to see animal therapists. As Jack Nicholson might say “Sell crazy somewhere else, we’re all stocked up here.”

Still, it takes all kinds.

Hulk 2.0 Hulk 2.0: A Welcome Upgrade

Hulk 2.0

I was ready not to see The Hulk and if by some chance “The Happening” had been any good, I probably would not have seen it till on DVD and that would have been a mistake. The Hulk, like Iron Man earlier this summer, was very well made, produced, directed, andacted. It came as a total shock how good it was considering some of the strange reviews I saw of the movie, such as the ones imitating the Hulks limited vocabulary.

The last time around the CGI was cool eye candy but so fake it was laughable, but Eric Bana’s depiction of a scientist overloaded with gamma radiation just didn’t work at all for me. Nick Nolte seemed to be dragged out of a holding cell for the movie and although Connelly did a decent job as his girlfriend, there seemed to be no chemistry.

This time around though, Edward Norton does a great job as Bruce Banner. As some have said, he plays it without pretension. There is a sense of a real desperation in him as he experiments on his blood to rid himself of what he sees as an affliction or curse rather than something superhuman and a talent. the desperation though is often controlled by the breathing techniques he has learned as well as his years as a scientist.

Tim Roth does a great job as Emil Blonsky, a foil to Norton who likes the idea of so much power and resilience in his body that he will go through a number of painful injections to get what Banner already has. He plays his growing insanity well, understated, but with a tense desire to be a force with which to reckon.

William Hurt, aside from the mustache which looks like a cross between a mangy dog and worn out carpet, does a decent job as well as General Ross. He seems intent on bringing Banner back to the military base so that he can replicate Banner’s work in order to make more super soldiers. A sentiment that is echoed in Iron Man earlier this summer.

Finally. I could not finish talking about acting if I did not mention Tim Blake Nelson’s depiction of Samuel Sterns, who plays a doctor that Banner has been corresponding with in order to figure out a way to eradicate the gamma radiation from Banner’s system. Stern plays almost a comical mad scientist character in this movie who only sees all the potential benefits of Banner’s breakthroughs as opposed to Banner’s belief that this is some sort of an abomination of nature.

There is also a synergy in this movie that gives nods to the TV series and comic and brings, really, the best of those world together into the big screen and makes it a truly fun experience to watch. As someone who is not a Liv Tyler fan, I also liked her in this movie as she gave it an emotional depth that lacked in the other movie she was in a few short weeks earlier, the Strangers.

There were many great moments of this movie. Like the scene where the Hulk brings Liv Tyler to this rock outcropping during a rainstorm and lies her underneath it. There was a sense in this one that indeed a woman could calm the heart of a savage beast.

“The Happening” Another Misstep by Shyamalan

The Happening, the latest movie by M Night Shyamalan heads off in the second week of June, and languishes. Mark Wahlberg stars as a teacher who is on the run from something happening. The thing that “is happening” starts in city parks and apparently disorients, stops, and causes suicidal tendencies. People stab themselves in the neck with pens, they drive into trees, they jump in front of lawnmowers, the dive off buildings and the list goes on. Then of course there are those that choose a slow and painful death who watch any of the M Night Shyamalan’s movies between Signs and this most recent one.

There is a lot of watching the wind….closeups of Zooey Deschanel’s face as she looks freaked out, and a lot of bewilderment and speculation about what is causing “the happening.” The fact that it is not global, but regional is part of the thing that has everyone puzzled. Is it a terrorist attack? Or is it a natural phenom like the blooms of alagae in the ocean that suddenly creeped up out of nowhere.

I knew we were in trouble in this movie when early on Wahlberg is asking students in his science class about theories concerning the disappearance of honey bees and then remarking that “The fact is, we don’t know what causes it, but later we will write down our theories in science book like they were facts.” I knew this was a Shyamalan rationalization.

The problem with this movie, and this is the spoiler, is there is no satisfying answer to this question. I think this is because Shyalaman wants to get away from “the big twist” endings of his movies because he realizes that as far as that goes…he has had about two hits in this matter, and its hard to keep coming up with something that keeps people on their toes.

And that is a problem, because we expected something of a twist. The twist in this case is there is no twist. There are guesses, speculations. And in the movies, unless it is a movie about a historical event, we really don’t want something that has no real satisfying ending…especially in the horror genre.

There were great moments throughout the movie. Some good acting from Wahlberg and Deschanel, but 2/3 of the way through the film it felt like the writers packed up and went on strike. So, you are left there with this hollow feeling at the end of the movie. The satisfying end to this review is, don’t go see this unless you are a big Shyamalan fan and just have nothing else better to do than go to the movies…you know, like me.

You Don’t Mess With The Second Rate Cliche Plot

I saw “You Don’t Mess with the Zohan” today and the movie was pretty good and about on par with any of the Adam Sandler movies out there. The problem I had with the movie is not with the jokes, it is with the old moldy comedy plot. You know the plot I am talking about.

The plot is that a person who is out of their element comes to a new place or community and finds out that the new friends he has might get kicked out of the community in favor of some big corporate gigantor building something in it’s place. So then the protagonist and their friends find a way through a large contest of some kind to earn money and thwart the evil rich person’s plans.

Really?

The movie had this plot and it was not even needed. They could have stuck with the whole “Why can’t we just get along” main plot that had really a better hook to it than the crappy, “hey, we are going to tear down your neighborhood and build a Mall with a Roller-coaster on it” plot that pretty much sucks all around. It is something best left to those Spring Break, rated R because we see plenty of boobs, kinda movies that made cable so famous back in late eighties.

Zohan had it all, and then had to mar it by succumbing to such an old comedy convention it would make Milton Berle wince. It’s like painting a mustache on the Mona Lisa.

I think there needs to be a decision to take that plot, stick it bare bones into a time capsule, and shoot it into space. We need to move on, find something of better value, or if you are going to use it, at least make it organic. Make it feel like something that is not grafted on like a second nose, or another ear.

Kingdom of the Crystal Skull Falls Short

Harrison Ford reprises his role as Indiana Jones in “Indiana Jones and the Kingdom of the Crystal Skull.” Once again George Lucas managed to take a perfectly good movie franchise and make material that should feel comfortable and warm seem alien and awkward. From the opening credits there are things that make the movie seem a bit “off.”

First of all, I think it was set in the wrong era. Because of the Elvis song, the nuclear age references, it didn’t feel right. Dragging Harrison Ford as Indiana Jones in the age of the Cold War felt like grave robbing. But there would be no way to explain Harrison Ford’s age otherwise which definitely screams out that they should never have even made this movie. Or, even more unlikely, they find a replacement for Ford similar to a replacement to James Bond.

Secondly, the CGI of this movie is even more noticeable and painful than the Star Wars prequels. Part of what made the Indiana Jones films great is that they were a departure from the alien worlds of Star Wars. They used models, green screen, rubber snakes, and it felt “right” in those movies. CGI in an indiana Jones movie would be as alien as making the Big Chill take place in space…or replacing Jaws with a CGI version.

In this movie, the CGI sticks out like a sore thumbs from the gophers/prairie dogs, to the semi sentient monkeys who apparently were patriots, to the scampering cgi ants. It turned the movie into something artificial and surreal.

Because of the CGI that was at times gratuitous, it brought down the rest of the film making it sub par and torpedoing it below the other three movies by more than the span of decades. While I am not strongly saying that it ruined by childhood by seeing this movie, it did not make me think warm feelings about anything else Lucas might release in the theaters.

Guild Hopping and My WoW playing behavior

Something I wish people took better stock of in World of Warcraft is the practice of moving from one guild to another as often as they change their underwear. You see them swap guilds like they are trading cards, or pocket change and it raises a level of wariness when deciding to invite someone else to a guild. It is just something that should be thought out well and long and without impulse. But as there is a sense of the anonymous on the internet, that seems to spread to guilds as well.

“Hmmmm the wind has changed, and so must my guild.”

This is a community of players that supposedly you have spent time with and have gone questing with, and leaving them should not be an easy matter. I don’t care if you entered a guild simply to get some cool instance gear, or because your friend landed you there a week ago, or you simply thought the name was cool, it just should not be like leaving a restaurant to leave a guild.

It should even be harder to leave if you have managed to acquire gear with the help of these people along the way. I can’t tell you the way I felt burned when a character would leave our guild after I helped purchase their mount or ran through an instance with them to get some gear that they (at the time) could not live without. It felt like they left only when they could not milk anything else out of that guild.

My main, though, has much of his gear through Battlegrounds and I steered away from group missions along most of my time in the guild, so I have never felt that obligated to stay because of gear related reasons. For me, it is out of friendship or loyalty that I stayed and still stay. Still, I can understand the frustration someone named Tobold wrote about in his blog.

My main has only been in three guilds. The first one was small and never seemed to get off the ground but we had our fun with it, the second one was in the process of a schism when I joined it, and I went with half the schism to a sister guild when it broke apart. So if one argued, you could actually say my main has only been in two guilds….and now I might yet be in a third.

But I am hesitant. Because I believe part of the reason for my ambivalent guild experience is myself. Yes, this is only a game and one must not take it too seriously, but what fun is a game if at times you don’t at least delve into some of the strategies and potential foibles that brought you to this point? I know lately in my respect it is because my main has become the sugar-daddy for my alts. He essentially is a guild bank within a guild.

I love to solo level. I don’t have to wait for groups, I don’t have to sign on at any certain time and place. It gives me flexibility and I don’t have to plan for anything. But I feel I am also missing something from the game by not tapping the social aspect of it. I group with people when I can to avoid ninja-ing someone else’s quest items and when I do it is often a positive experience.

A guild though should take more stock of casual players and those that are more dedicated. Let the ones that are casual remain so, but give them incentives to get more involved. Those that are dedicated give them incentives to get those that are not so into it a chance to really enjoy the game too. The upper levels need to help the lower levels and at the same time give them a chance at end game content.

I can’t see adding penalties for guild hopping. It might be nice though if there was a way to track players guild behavior. If they often hop from guild to guild…you know there is something up with them. That is also something a guild master would like to know.

Honorable mention goes to Massively.

A Bit About PVP and Spilled Milk: A WoW Story

In World of Warcraft there is a time and a place when we gather and fight each other known as PVP or Player vs. Player. If you are on a PVE server or Player Vs. Environment server, you probably are not too interested in round the clock PVP play: most of your day is spent gathering stuff for quests, like centaur ears(nasty), as well as killing creatures and demons and other denizens of the world. You also get XP by exploring new places, and donating materials to the local alliance faction.

There are two types of servers, or realms. Think of realms as identical but separate versions of a world. Or perhaps, it would be like different hard drives that contain the same data for a world, but has different characters or players on each of the realms or servers. The PVE server is one where you voluntarily go flagged for attacking another player. On the PVP realms, you are only unflagged in uncontested safe areas, such as alliance/horde towns and cities. The rest of the time you’re on your own.

In the PVE server I am on, PVP occurs a number of different ways. You enter an enemy city, and you will get flagged for PVP. You heal someone else in battle with a player of the enemy factions, you get flagged. You attack a player who is flagged, or a guard of a major enemy town or city, you get flagged. There is also a glitch whereby an unflagged person can get attacked by a hunter’s snakes and thus will become flagged and summarily killed, but that is unusual, and a player can get banned for such activities.

I am not a big fan of PVP, I think I could also be said to not be that good at it. Still, I despise the practice of high level characters going to low level towns and basically going “War of the Worlds” on those towns, killing quest givers, flight masters, etc. So, I make it kinda my duty while playing an alt(alternative character) of a lesser level to turn into my level 70 rogue(my main character) when this occurs.

The other night, as luck would have it, such a thing occurred while my dwarf paladin was heading back from a quest in Desolace. Nigel’s point was getting hammered. If it had been by the level 38 alone, I would have let it go. The town was definitely a challenge for a level 38 player, and it would have been admirable had the blood elf come alone. Sadly, she (I am estimating here since a lot of dudes apparently play female characters) came along with a level 70 hunter who mowed down pretty much everything in town that could synthetically or artificially breath.

So I sat my dwarf down in the inn and became the level 70 rogue, and had to fly like six minutes to reach Nigel’s from Darnassas (This is a long way for game time…something that I think the hordie was counting on to dissuade retribution). Six minutes later and I thought perhaps the hordie had left, but didn’t. The level 38 wisely went unflagged; not the hunter. So it was vindication time for my rogue. He killed the level 70 twice, once as he was trying to flee the scene. Both times, I avoided the hunters pet and went after Mr. Ranged attacker with a sense of exhilarated glee.

It could have ended there, but didn’t. The thing about PVP is that it is a coin toss. I have been mauled by level 70 hunters, and I have mowed a couple over in my time, and this one I could tell wanted an easy time of it and was not expecting trouble. It doesn’t end there though, the guy logged on using a level 15 alliance alt and berated me for ending his fun.

There are constant insult tactics used when an enemy player gets his karmic return a little earlier than expected. This person called me uptight, immature, too serious, cold, callous, etc. The first thing he asked me though was if I had no life. That actually made me laugh about the South Park WoW episode where the people from Blizzard sat around a table and asked the question “How do you kill that which has no life?”

With PVP, you got to expect anything. And if you whack anything, you have to expect coming whackation. It is going to happen. You might escape here and there, if you are lucky, but it’s going to happen. Yes, it is just a game, and that is precisely my point. I like